janet what’s wrong? everything.
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My dream right now is to keep my family together and my wife out of jail. And take apart this hammer-knife I made to kill the undead, and use the hammer portion to build bookshelves. Then, when my workday is done, the knife to cut brie and, perhaps, an apple.
a mood
“‘I would be obliged if you would stop being concerned,’ Ataba snapped. ‘I know what is happening. It starts with knives and cooking pots, and suddenly we belong to the trousermen, yes, and you send priests and our souls do not belong to us.’ ‘I’m not doing anything like that!’ ‘And when your father comes in his big boat? What will happen to us then?’ ‘I…don’t know,’ said Daphne, which was better than telling the truth. We do tend to stick flags in places, she had to admit it herself. We do it almost absentmindedly, as though it’s a sort of chore. ‘Hah, you fall silent,’ said the priest. ‘You are a good child, the women say, and you do good things, but the difference between the trousermen and the Raiders is that sooner or later the cannibals go away!’”
— Terry Pratchett, “Nation” (via noirandchocolate)
“Good evening, gentlemen! Please pay attention. I am a reformed vampire, which is to say, I am a bundle of suppressed instincts held together with spit and coffee. It would be wrong to say that violence does not come easily to me. It’s not tearing your throats out that doesn’t come easily to me. Please don’t make it any harder.” -Terry Pratchett, Monstrous Regiment
iampinbitch 